Chuck Norris facts pack 4

• Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
• Chuck Norris does not wear a condom. Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.
• There is no chin under Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
• Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles" contest. Chuck Norris won... by five.
• When Chuck Norris crosses the street, the cars have to look both ways.
• Chuck Norris counted to infinity. Twice.
• Jesus turned water into wine, Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.
• If you have 10 dollars and Chuck Norris has 10 dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
• When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
• The only time Chuck Norris was wrong was when he thought he had made a mistake.
• Chuck Norris can beat the Sun in a staring contest.
• Chuck Norris' funny bone has never made him laugh, but it has been used to kill
• Chuck Norris has already been to Mars. That's why there are no signs of life there.
• Chuck Norris doesn't dial wrong phone numbers, people answer the wrong phone.
• They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
• Chuck Norris can hold his breathe for nine years.
• Chuck Norris CAN eat just one Lay's potato chip.
• A roundhouse kick by Chuck Norris is the preferred method of execution in 16 states.
• Chuck Norris is suing MySpace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.
• There is no such thing as a lesbian, there are just girls who have never met Chuck Norris.
• Chuck Norris can tell a black joke with out looking over his shoulder .
• When Chuck Norris had surgery, the anesthesia was applied to the doctors.
• Chuck Norris invented the wet nap when he picked up a paper towel and it pissed itself.
• When Chuck Norris goes to sleep, nightmares try and stay awake.
• Once a grizzly bear threatened to eat Chuck Norris. Chuck showed the bear his fist and the bear proceeded to eat himself, because it would be the less painful way to die.
• If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the fuck down.
• Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris