Chuck Norris facts pack 1

• fork() in a Chuck Norris program returns a roundhouse kick in the face ... there can be only one!!!
• Chuck Norris can delete the recyling bin.
• Chuck Norris's preferred sorting algorithm is killsort. It kills everything that is out of place.
• For a DBA an execution plan tells how a query is going to run. For Chuck Norris is the list of people he's going to kill.
• Chuck Norris doesn't believe in fault tolerance. Only in fault punishment.
• Chuck Norris doesn't use fork(). Only knife().
• In UNIX, if you run the command "whereis Chuck Norris" you get the following output: You don't find Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris finds you!
• In the old days, the first program everybody wrote was the "Hello Chuck Norris", but he was killing everyone that assumed his identity, so now it was downgraded to a lesser entity: "World".
• When Chuck Norris drops more than 100 tables he is on a KILING SPREE.
• Chuck Norris doesn't need a cell phone; he just speaks normally and the other person listens.
• You don't need an antivirus nor a firewall to protect your computer. Just a Chuck Norris wallpaper.
• Core got dumped by Chuck Norris.
• Chuck Norris' Keyboard does not have any F1 key, he prefers NASCAR.